Another Lame Saturday...

Welcome Back Blog Readers,

Yep Yep, You guessed it... I'm posting this from work... It is Saturday after all, which means another lame Saturday shift.

This last week as a whole has been very frustrating and tiring. My Boss is out in England until Thursday, so I'm the lucky one that gets to cover for him.

I am getting sick and tired of being the company door mat, and I will give my boss a day or two to get back in the swing of things before letting him know how I feel.
Basically giving him a chance to offer some sort of compensation for the fact that I'll be working close to 60 hours, but only getting paid for 40 hours. I'd like to get paid for the extra time that I've put in... I don't think I will... I didn't last time I was here for 6 weeks while the company was looking for a new Manager.

I'll try to explain how things work.. I can see where there may be a little confusion I am a salary paid employee... Non managament...My salary is based on an hourly rate at 40 hours/week. Which seems reasonable, but that's how the company gets around paying for overtime. I'm not too bothered if I work 41-45 hours every once in a while... but to work 50+ hours and only getting paid for 40 hours isn't right.

I'd even settle for a few paid days OFF As it sits now, I'm not due for vacation time until December (1 week/ 40hours) and I think I may have 1 sick day left(out of 3).... More than likely I'll be offered to go home early without pay of course... or have the option of coming in a little late....or at the very least, I'll get a "Thank You"....

At this point I am seriously considering looking for another job. I just want to know that I'm not going to be stuck making the same piddly amount for the rest of my life. I need to know that as the cost of living continues to rise, so will my income. I know the economy is in a bit of a slump right now and I should be gratefull I even have a job,when there are so many people that don't. I think you all know where I'm coming from though...

*Changing the subject*

I'm still having trouble sleeping... the last few nights have been the worse yet, I have been able to get 2-3 full hours in along with a lot of tossing/turning. It's the falling asleep that is the hardest part.. Still having 101 things on my mind going at mach speed. I will admit that last night was an improvement though.
I still refuse to resort to drinking/ sleeping pills for the fear of addiction. A fear is all that it is, since I've never been addicted to anything... ok ok EU/PE but never a subtance abuse. To be completely honest, I've never experimented with drugs for that reason. I just don't want to associate drinking with sleeping... if that makes sense...

*On another note*

We have 2 new PE Addicts!! Runeswan and Leo are a nice addition and I am confident they will feel at home with us.

I'm still hoping to find 2 more players to add to the roster. 1 more from North America and 1 from anywhere

The PE Addicts have been on FIRE!! this last week! Many globals and HoF's and I finally hit the mother load after 2.5 years! An Uber loot of 4232 peds from a Daikiba Provider I shared with my soc mates before the impulse shopping began. I bought a few 5B plates to add to my Gremlin, bought a enmatter 103 amp, and a 103 amp for my Shriek Back Alley... a few bp's, some materials for crafting textures, and a few small chips to regain what I lost in chipping out a few months ago....Now I'm trying to make the remaining peds last as long as possible.... We'll see how long that lasts...

*sigh* Other than that... not much more to report...Rightfully I have another 2.5 hours to go before the end of the day... OHHHH just got the update, we are closing in 30 minutes SWEET!!!! In that case I have to receive the order before we close...

Thanks again for reading/listening.....

Last Woman Standing...

Welcome back,

Yesterday afternoon, I felt it was time to swallow my pride on an issue that has been weighing heavily on me for almost 7 years. This was a battle of who is the most stubborn, a "Last Woman Standing" challenge, if you will... An on going battle between my Mother and I.

I guess there is no better place to start, than the beginning...
This all goes back...to the Spring of 2001. I had called my mother to let her know that I was getting Married and I was hoping that she could be there. She was happy for me and just let me know that she too had gotten remarried (for the 3rd time) to a man I don't approve of... but that's a whole other story for another day.
Knowing how I felt about her new husband, she asked if he was invited too... I told her that I could not in good conscience have that man there knowing what he's done and the fact that there will be small children there... believe me, it's not just a petty matter of me disliking him... I have good reason... the fact that he can't be trusted alone with a child should be enough..

Anyway... my mother took offense to my answer and said that since he's not invited, she wasn't going either That was disappointing.... My mother has missed out on so many things in my life, like the Sweet 16, the 18th birthday, the 21st birthday, the heartbreaks of young puppy love, and now what is suppose to be the best day of my life, she willingly tossed aside.

Long story short, the wedding went as planned and she never did show up. The fact that she couldn't set her pride aside for a few hours still breaks my heart. Her loss I guess...or at least that what I tell myself...

Since then, we have not said 1 word to each other... well until yesterday.
I have had her phone# on my fridge for over a year now, contemplating whether or not I should be the one to make the first move.... again. I got to thinking about how she might be feeling all these years, knowing her kids are somewhere out there, and neither of them call or try to make contact with her. Thinking it must be hard on her and maybe I'm ready to forgive her for the choices she'd made. I will admit that growing up with out a mother was tough, and there were many times I could have used a shoulder to cry on or some motherly advise....

So yesterday afternoon, I finally picked up the phone and made the call... She said she was happy to hear from me and wondered how long it would take before one of us would contact her. She also admitted that her pride got in the way and joked about that being the 1 trade i inherited from her.
Before I made the call, I was unsure of what to say to her after so many years.... but after a few minutes I got all emotional and as much as I tried to hold back the sniffling and the tears, I couldn't... I'm passing it off as many years of bottled up emotions...

We were able to catch up on things for about 30 minutes before my phone died, but we have each other on MSN now.... So at least the line of communication is somewhat open. I'm not looking to be all buddy buddy with her, in some respects I have to get to know her again. You see, I have not lived with her since I was 9 years old, 21 years ago...again... that's another story.
For me it about getting closure... and finally being able to put the past behind me and letting go of a grudge that I've held on to for so long. We've lost so many years and missed out on so many things....I've thrown in the towel, hoping that I get positive results. Or at least knowing I tried and made the attempt....

Thanks again for reading/listening....

Midnight Madness!!!

It's 12:38am at the moment and I should be fast asleep... I should say, most nights I'm fast asleep by now... Most nights I'm asleep with in 10-15 minutes at the most.... but not tonight.

The Movie I was watching ended at midnight and I went straight to bed. At least that was my intention...

Seems it's another one of those restless nights where I can't seem to find the OFF button, so I have 101 things on my mind which are keeping me awake.

So here I am, posting my 25th blog entry. Perhaps after I vent a little frustration, I'll feel a little better and will be able to fall asleep.... makes sense to me anyway..

This last week has had more ups and downs then a rollercoaster. I've had to deal with yet another new manager, finally getting an answer about getting a pay raise after 3 years, only to get slapped in the face with what was offered... Turning the big 3-0 which was rather depressing to be completely honest...having a 4 day weekend, which seems to be the only good thing so far... and feeling frustrated and sad because I miss James so much *sigh* I think that's everything....

I guess there is no better place to start than the beginning... I know in a previous entry I mentioned having a new Manager, there are some adjustments to be made now that he's here enforcing new rules and new ways of doing things.... to be expected..

I have been asking for a raise for the last 3 years and so far every time I've mentioned it to the powers that be, I get the same answers which have been " Now is not a good time, ask me again in the Spring." "Last month was not a good month, ask again once business picks up." "No one is getting a raise this year." All of my requests have been swept under the rug in hopes that I'll stop asking. Finally on Thursday which was my 30th birthday coincidentally, I finally got an answer.... The powers that be wanted to offer a whole whopping $20.00 a week to my paycheck.... all of a 50 cent/hour raise! My new manager of 4 days questioned that and suggested $40.00 a week ( $1.00/hour more) I should tell you that I was not present when this little pow wow took place... No No I was at lunch and was never asked before the paperwork was handed in to Human Resources Now HR has to go through my record and see that I've been a good girl and IF they approve that request gets sent to one of the Owner's to make the final decision. Which is complete BS!!!! No one from HR knows me or can say whether or not I deserve a pay increase, Nor does the Owner know who I am. Seems the immediate managers no longer have the power to give raises.... I just don't understand their way of thinking sometimes..... From what I understand, I could be waiting another 3 weeks for an answer.... Still, I had a game plan, I was NOT going to settle for a mere $1.00/hour more... Not after busting my ass for 3 years, This company is not even decent enough to give their employees a cost of living increase...For me the was the Ultimate slap in the face!!! I know, most of you are probably thinking that $1.00 more is better than nothing... and you're right... every little bit helps... But it's the principle of the matter that pisses me off.

Next up.... the BIG 30.... I think this was the first year I actually worked and was not on vacation... that and this was the first year I spent it by myself... Kinda sad really... I started thinking about my life, where I am, what I've accomplished, which I couldn't come up with an answer too, knowing I could be happier IF my life wasn't "On Hold" at the moment ...so that made matters just that much more depressing...

And last, but certainly not least.... the time apart from James My heart goes out to those of you that for whatever reason are separated from your significant other. James had to go back to Calgary during the last week of April. We do chat on msn everyday and we use skype and our webcams sometimes. We also find time to hunt in game together... But it's just not the same as being together in person... it's the little things I miss ...like the warm welcome when I got home form work, the way he'd tuck me in at night if I were going to bed first, the nights we'd go to bed and lay there talking till 3am, well you get the point...
It's tough having to spend so much time apart. We do try to make the best of the situation, and we know that our relationship is that much stronger for having endured months of separation. The next time we are together will be that much sweeter

Many nights I've laid in bed and thought of all the great times we've shared and I smile and in the same instant I feel the tears trickling down. I wish I could pass it off as tears of joy, but that's not the case

So, that's pretty much what's been running through my mind, like a broken record... and why I can't fall asleep right away... and Good God it's already 2:15am....Now that I've had a chance to vent... maybe now I'll try to get some sleep..... no promises...

I hope you sleep well... Thanks for listening/ reading....

Obsessed Much.....

That's right, I'm back already with blog entry #24

In this entry I'll share a few real life experiences with what I refer to as my Stalkers. No, I don't mean that I have had an Atrox Stalker chasing me as I'm going to work. But, instead the creepy male customers, past and present I have unfortunately had to deal with.

I don't know what it is, but I seem to be a creepy man magnet. Apparently there is a glowing neon sign the hangs above my head, that reads, " Please, be my Stalker!" This glowing neon sign must be invisible to the "normal" people I come in contact with. But like a moth to a flame, it attracts the creepy stalkers.

Let's see... My first creepy encounter was 12 years ago. I was 17 just out of High School and working at my first Dealership. I started off filing the repair orders, and I was the phone operator at night before I started my career in Parts. Creepy guy #1 was a semi retired Shuttle/Courtesy driver. He worked part time and was old enough to be my father. This guy was one of those close talkers... you know the type that always feels the need to invade your personal space when he talks to you. That in itself was enough of a warning sign.. Plus the fact that his terms of endearment went from sweetie to hunny to hey baby and then felt the need to hint that maybe we should go out to dinner sometime! Uhm... how about NO!!! I made sure to tell the Service Manager about how uncomfortable this other employee made me... Seems I wasn't the only one to complain about him I believe he was transfered to another store shortly after.

At the age of 19 I moved 1100 miles south to sunny Florida! I was working for an after market Parts Store. During my time there I noticed one guy that kept coming in on a weekly basis for about 1-2 months and he always took his time walking up and down the aisles and just acted a bit.... suspicious...
Seems one day he finally gained enough courage to talk to me and asked if I had a boyfriend, which at the time I did. I answered yes and figured that was the end of that... WRONG!!
Seems this little Stalker didn't get the hint that I was in NO WAY interested.
I let a co worker know what I thought about this customer and she said she noticed his behavior too, and passed it off as a harmless crush.... Nope, He felt the need to take his crush 1 step too far. One morning I was scheduled to open at 7:30 with the same employee. We unlocked the front doors at 8am and I went out to my car for some reason... I forget why... and in the car next to mine was the creepy stalker #2.
I was trying to get what I went out there for and get my ass back inside... That didn't go as planned... he then stood in front of me and asked where I was going. I told him that I needed to get back inside the store. He then proceeded to say, "Not before you give me my present." and then leaned in to kiss me. I was scared to death but managed to push him away from me before he could and got inside as fast as I could to my co worker and let her know what had just happened and that I refuse to deal with him. She didn't want any trouble and fully understood my situation. The creepy stalker lingered in the store for what seemed like forever. I called my boyfriend and told him what just happened, luckily we lived 5 minutes away and he brought his father. I pointed the guy out to my boyfriend and his father calmly walked over to the creepy stalker and made small talk with him... Along the lines of..."So, that girl behind the counter is cute!" the stalker agrees and My b/f's father says "You see that young man over there? "Well, he was just informed of what you tried to do with his girlfriend, and I suggest you apologize to that nice young girl and never come in this store again"!! "I don't ever want her to call me and tell me that you were in here giving her a hard time!!" That was the end of creepy stalker #2.

My present day Stalker... I was suckered into meeting this creepy guy within my first week of working at my current dealership. I didn't realize he was one of our wholesale customers. He had bought a car from us and was getting some work done and needed a ride back to work. I was the poor sucker to drive the courtesy van and drop him off. On the way there he seemed alright, nothing seemed out of place YET... A few months go bye and the 2 co workers got laid off and the other quit, since then he always asks for me. Which sometimes is nice that you build a certain level of trust and confidence with some customers...but not this one His creepiness has evolved over the last few months. Every time he calls and I answer it's always "Hey baby, how you doin' "? And ends with him hinting that we should go out sometime... He's even told me that his first girlfriend was a red head and since then he's always had a "thing" for them... Well I suggest he gets his eyes checked... I've never been a red head. It's gotten to the point now where he calls just for the sake of hearing me on the other end. I kid you not!! Last Saturday he called during my lame Saturday shift to say Hi and let me know he was thinking about me and wanted to see how my day was... I told him business was busy... which it wasn't... and that I had a customer at the retail window to take care of... which I didn't... I'd much rather hear the sound of fingernails across a chalk board, before giving him the time of day... And he called again today... He was out in a customer's car taking it out for a test drive and wanted to call to ask about my day. The usual blah blah blah, ending with a sorry I have to go. *CLICK*
I have told the last 2 managers about him, just so that somebody knows. I don't think it's being taken seriously. My last manager would answer the phone and of course the stalker would ask for me.. instead of covering for me... nope I get " Your Stalker is on line 1 for you."................ Thanks

I seriously don't know what it is with some people... last time I knew NO means NO. If you dropped hints to someone you liked and they NEVER made the initiative to call you, or attempt to spend time with you, wouldn't you take the hint.... and think, maybe they are NOT interested.

I just want to go to work everyday and do my job. I take enough crap on a weekly basis, from a few "know it all" customers... I don't go to work to be sexually harassed by the customers. I am fully aware that I'm a female in a male dominant industry... That doesn't mean I want to go out to dinner with you, or want to have a personal/intimate relationship with you or even want to talk about the big block motor you rebuilt and how fast it can go from 0 to 60 mph.

If you thought I was that type of girl, You are sadly mistaken.

Don't get me wrong now guys... I know that you're not 100% at fault here. I have seen 1 case where a female customer was harassing a male technician. Yep Yep.... This happened in the same store I'm at now. We have a customer we'll call Barbara and our Master tech Andy.
Seems Andy fixed whatever problem Barbara had with her vehicle and since that day a few years ago.... She always requested that Andy work on her car... No one else was to touch it.... We see that from time to time. Well, Barbara would do what she could to sneak in the shop where Andy was working and want to stand around and watch him work... which btw is a big NO NO to you customers. Customers are NOT allowed in most shops unless they are with an employee.
She even went as far as offering him a Free Massage.... She claims to be certified... and was willing to go to his house...( yeah, I'll bet). Even with poor Andy it was a running joke, everyone laughing but him.... I remember one day he happened to see her pull in and he made a bee line to the men's room in the shop... He waited there for 20 minutes and made sure she was gone before coming out. This lady is scary looking. I'd run and hide too if I saw her coming.

A bit of advice for those stalkers out there... if there is someone you have taken an interest in, and they tell you they have a wife/ husband, bf/gf Please take the hint and move on. If you still feel the need to buy them a gift like a cup of coffee or even send them flowers at their place of work... DON'T
Most place I've worked for will not allow their employees to accept gifts from customers and you could get them fired. Instead, let their manager know that you think they are doing a good job.

If anyone can tell me how to turn off my glowing neon sign, I'd be most grateful